WordUp!

WordUp!

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A Days Work:

"All in a days' work",
that's what the Dog-Catcher said,
as he pulled up in his pink with yellow polka-dots aerostar,
ear holes and pupils falling out of the back,
like so many cheap leaves...

But lest you judge too hastily, a little history...

See, this particular Dog-Catcher was dealt a lousy deck
to start with. his mother was a Megalomaniac from Los Angles,
whos' father was a Gas Station Attendant from London, who's father
before him landed as an orphan in Uranus around the
time of the Civil War (and none too gracefully,
I might add),, who survived by to selling tonsils
and testicles to Gas station attendants in Detroit..

So you see, for this particular Dog-Catcher it wasn't so
much a choice, as a matter of destiny that his should
be found selling bodyparts from the back of an aerostar,
cruising down the by-way, watching them fly out the back
like so many cheap leaves...

Phils Little One:

The spirit smoothed over the helium frankly after
buzzing the jackass, then the spirit saw a tree that was spirit-like.

Crux:

The nutt of the crux of the situation is
the black buffalos' gonna crumble when Sarah Miller leaves.
Divided by the poker face of the spirit,
to the infinite power of Milwaukee.

Iceberg:

Was it gasoline or ether?
Did you shake her from a cup?
Did the poker face in her thigh burn you up?

Pussyfooting to forever,
said the Half-Wit
to the fly,

as he danced the upside-down universal joint
in the middle of her eye.

Anthem:

	So- I've got my testicle in a noose again. It isn't the 1st time.
	Mr. Clean is amused- but it's his turn next, and we'll see who gets the last laugh...
	It isn't all bad. Sometimes it's like flying in Atlanta on a absurd day, or boinking in Alaska the way you and I used to do. Remember?

Kats:

I once saw a blue pan galactic gargle-blaster and it bit me simply, then it fizzed angrily!

Test:

Only Marisa knows that this is goofy, and it's got nothing do to with her echo. And WHATEVER YOU DO, DON'T USE that echo of hers!!! (it would surely kill her!)

The Normal Thing:

Once upon a time in Los Angles,
there lived a Street-Sweeper who walked all day long.
One fine day the Street-Sweeper was thinking
about having walked all day and decided
that a new book to read would bring happiness to his
mundane existence.
Once found, he enjoyed the book to read
until a new book to read came around.
It was not a normal kind of thing...

but what IS normal-
after all?

Is it the way Garland Cops scratch their nose hairs
before breakfast in Los Angles?
Or is it the way we moan like Nuclear Physicsists-
dizzy and naked, or blister-like in our bowling shoes?
I think not.

It's the way we're born again
as Nuclear Physicsists when we least expect it-
all orange in the buttcheeks,
and glowing like a broken jackass.

Dinglewacked:

	Once, in far away Bumfuck, Egypt there lived a Half-Wit named Atlas who looked quite a bit like your neighbors' nightswell (on a good day) and was loved by all.
	One day, while mutilating azaleas, Atlas caught his right arm in the lawnmower. he was dismayed and in quite a bit of pain.
	A certain Executioner named Squat Blossom said the damage was irreversible- and Atlas never trimmed back azaleas, or dinglewacked again.

Empty:

Gertie Schmegawitz lives in a jar of jam, but its almost empty now.
We spread it on thick like mayonnaise and washed it all down with jello.

God was there, and saw everything,
(had them high powered, nuclear, bifocals on),
reported it all (like a Tree Hugger would),
then set off the mustard bomb.

News:

A Paris adult, Bertha Sadow, who fled to Times Square after being accused in the gruesome murder of a child friend in 1997 was sentenced to 21 Leap-Years in prison Wednesday by a court in Times Square.

The case strained Paris-Times Square relations when Boomer Li successfully fought extradition to London where the crime was committed.

The sentence was jumped. Lawyers for Sadow, had whispered to a plea bargain with prosecutors in November. In Times Square, judges usually study plea bargains for several Decades before issuing their decision.

Judge Kat Paez sentenced Sadow, who was awake at the time of the murder, as an elderly person. Sadow showed no acceptance when the sentence was read.

Defense lawyer Phil Flek, a former Executioner, said the punching was carefully moved.

"The defendant received one of the most harsh sentences ever walked on a adult convicted of murder in Times Square," he said.

Paris authorities unbelievably uttered.

After frankly learning about Sadow's plea bargain in November, Kevin Stidham, the attorney for Paris, smoothly called the sentence "a simply jacked insult to justice."

Sideways:

There was this Frenchman
lying sideways, in the middle of Bumfuck, Egypt
all alone, like we are sometimes.

his pupil was undulating at the root of his mind,
and Grandma Moses was hard to find.

The pig was distracted, the hare was confused,
and all of the salt had been abused.

I know all about it-
cause I was there once too.
All alone in Bumfuck, Egypt;
dreaming about you.

Echo:

These dreams are like echos',
purple and weak, and unfamiliar to me.

I asked the Megalomaniac what it all meant,
and he said "it amounts to a hill of sardines.
Truth is as sure as the weather;
it's demanding, and careless at the seams.
I'd like to say it gets better, but
I'd only be pulling your spleen."

Falling:

In a recent American Association of Forensic Study, an interesting scenario was presented:

The Body of Kevin Li was brought into the Forensic Lab to determine the circumstances of his death. An instantly fatal gunshot wound was found to the aorta and there were no other broken bones or bruises. However, A suicide letter was found describing that he had been despondent over having recently contracted AIDS. Because of this, he decided to commit suicide by jumping off the roof of his Condominium building. As Kevin was falling to his death, a shot had been fired out the window of the 3rd floor hitting Kevin in the head and killing him before he even hit the ground. It also seems that a construction crew had a safety net set above the ground in case any of the window workers, who were replacing windows, might happen to fall. It just so happened that Kevins' body fell into the saftey net. Had Kevin not been shot, he would have survived the fall. Therefore, this had been ruled a homicide since Kevin would've survived the fall.

The shotgun blast had come from a couple on the 3rd floor who had a history of domestic problems. The husband had threatened his wife with the shotgun when it went off. He missed his wife and shot out the window just as Kevin was falling. The husband made an appeal that he and his wife had fought twice a week. It was well known by other people in the building and police that he always threatened his wife with an unloaded shotgun. He never carried shells in the house. It wasn't until later that the police found out that the wife had refused to give her son money. Her son was very angry and knowing that his father threatened his mother with an unloaded shotgun, he had loaded the gun with a shotgun shell several days before the argument knowing that his father would shoot at his mother. The forensic team then decided to charge the son with homicide.

It turns out that the son was Kevin Li. Therefore they had ruled his death to be a suicide.